A customer keeps sexually harassing me at work. What can I do?

Step by step

Say a regular keeps touching your back and commenting on your body, and it happened again tonight (illustrative).

1. 1If you feel unsafe right now, walk away from the table and get your manager. If you’re threatened or assaulted, call 911.
2. 2If you feel safe doing it, tell him it’s unwelcome: “Please don’t touch me.” The EEOC encourages this, but you don’t have to confront anyone to report it.
3. 3Tell your manager the same shift, and ask to have the table moved to someone else. Check your handbook for how to report harassment.
4. 4Follow up in writing (text or email) so there’s a dated record.
5. 5Write your own notes that night: date, time, table, what was said or done, who saw it, and who you told.
6. 6If it keeps happening, or nothing changes, contact the EEOC before your deadline runs out.

Not tax or legal advice. Names and details are made up. For your situation, contact the EEOC or an employment lawyer.

Plain English

Customers count

The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) says it’s unlawful to harass an employee because of their sex. That includes unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature, and also offensive remarks about someone’s sex. The EEOC says the harasser can be someone who isn’t an employee, such as a client or customer.

The law doesn’t cover simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that aren’t very serious. Harassment is illegal when it’s so frequent or severe that it creates a hostile or offensive work environment, or when it leads to a job decision like being fired or demoted.

When the restaurant is responsible

The EEOC says an employer is liable for harassment by non-employees it has control over, such as customers on the premises, if it knew or should have known about the harassment and failed to take prompt and appropriate corrective action. That’s why reporting it to your manager matters: it puts the restaurant on notice.

The federal law on sex harassment, Title VII, covers employers with 15 or more employees. If you work somewhere smaller, ask your state’s fair employment agency; state laws aren’t covered here.

Retaliation is also illegal

The EEOC says it’s unlawful to punish an employee for reporting harassment to a supervisor, answering questions in an investigation, resisting sexual advances, or filing a charge. Depending on the facts, the EEOC’s examples of retaliation include moving someone to a less desirable position and changing their schedule to make work harder.

Filing with the EEOC: the deadline

You generally need to file a charge within 180 calendar days of the discrimination. That’s extended to 300 calendar days if a state or local agency enforces a law against the same kind of discrimination. For ongoing harassment, the clock runs from the last incident, and the EEOC looks at all the incidents. Weekends and holidays count.

The EEOC also says its deadline generally isn’t paused while you try to work it out inside the company. You can use your employer’s complaint process and file with the EEOC at the same time.

How to file

• Start online through the EEOC Public Portal, which sets up an interview.
• Call 1-800-669-4000 to talk it through. The EEOC doesn’t take charges by phone, but it can tell you if your situation is covered and how to file.
• Visit an EEOC field office.
• File with your state or local fair employment agency. Where the EEOC has a worksharing agreement with that agency, a charge filed with one is also filed with the other.

If your deadline is close, the EEOC says to call and ask for an immediate interview.